How to eat an elephant? (Part 2)

Most common reasons for rejecting advice!

3 most common reasons why we reject advice are: appropriateness of advice, the way in which advice was given, and person giving the advice.

▪ “I think that advice wasn’t appropriate.” Maybe I think that advice given is not at all usable on my circumstances, or person that gave me advice does not have whole picture about my situation. My first reaction could be belittling the advice. But think about this: we are all imperfect men. Is it not possible that I should change my view on situation? I should ask myself: "Is there at least one good reason why that person gave me advice?" If there is, then I should definitely focus on that. One wise saying says: “Accept reminders, do not let them go. Treasure them. They can give you life.”

▪ “I do not like way in which advice was given.” True, taking into consideration sensitivity of giving and accepting advice, one should respect high criteria about how to give advice. But it is also true that we are all deficient and making errors. Perfect advice given on perfect way can be given only by perfect person. If we wait on that – We will never accept any advice. So, advices are taken through imperfect men and it would be good that we try not to look on the way advice is given. Instead, let’s look on what was advised and let’s think how we can apply it.

▪ “Is he/she going to give advice to me?!” If I think that deficiencies of adviser decrease value of his/hers advices, I should take into consideration mentioned earlier. There is no perfect human being; hence there is not perfect adviser. Similarly, if I think that because of my age, life experiences or responsibilities I have – I do not need any advice, I should really correct my views as soon as possible. Otherwise, instead of spiritual and intellectual growth I will remain hardened and cocooned, without opportunity to grow. In this day and age imperfect men are those who give us advices, and reasonable person willingly accepts and applies good advices, even in cases when she/he knows about certain quality or area more than adviser! If I have greater responsibilities or more experience than others, I should try even more to give good example in being reasonable and humble by accepting valid advices and applying them. This is the way how I can gain right to give advice to others when appropriate.

(see part 3 here)  (see part 1 here)